So the other day I heard about a mom who was telling her son that if he didn’t do this or that she was going to kill herself. Then I heard another mom tell her teenage son that she had him so he could take care of her. In both incidences I did not know the women. But it made me think about the mental pressure we put on our children either on purpose or inadvertently. I can remember my whole life my mother saying “I should just shoot myself in the head and then you’d be happy.” And I realize that the last time Hannah told me she hated me I reacted by saying “one day I will be gone and you will be an orphan and you will regret saying that.” And this mental torture gilt stuff doesn’t just apply to mother/child relationships, don’t we do this with our men too? I know I have said to my husband in a fit of rage during a fight something on the order of one day one of us will be dead so we just have to wait it out. When we are angry we can say the most wicked comments. And I honestly cannot remember my husband saying any such thing to me. So I do think it is a woman issue. The drama is all female. And when you combine motherhood and hormones, watch-out. The woman who told her kid she was going to kill herself is now having CPS look into what she said, because her husband freaked out (they are divorced.) And since it isn’t my family or friend I did not comment. But, clearly this woman should not lose her child over a stupid comment. My point being is mothers say a lot of stupid crap to their kids every day. Maybe we all need to be aware of this and zip it more. Maybe we are screwing up our kids more than we think. I do know that I grew up in a house with my mother who said anything at any time and I think I have a thicker skin and higher self esteem because of it. I think it is worse to be in a house where it is totally polite, there is no screaming, and your world is never rocked. What are your thoughts on this?
Read more posts from Darla's Blog
Recipes & Tips
How to buy organic
Written by Happy Housewife Beth
Organics have become such an important part of so many peoples lives, making them so much more available than ever before. For those who are still unsure of what organic foods are all about, here is some basic information that may make it easier to choose the organic section in your grocery store the next time you do... [Read more >>]
One of the best tips I can offer is to buy yourself a Crock Pot.Get one that has both High and Low settings & a removable, dishwasher safe crock, You will wonder how you’ve ever lived without one. It is great for popping a meal in and returning to your home filled with the aroma of dinner waiting and ready for you. Some even have a setting or... [Read more >>]
Marriage & Parenting
How to get your husbands to help around the house
Besides doing everything that is listed in the article 10 ways to make your husband king of his castle, I have one more very big tip that most women do not know about. But I will share with you as long as you are prepared to be surprised. Your husband will start doing what you ask and not letting it go in one ear and out the other. Stuff will actually... [Read more >>]
I just joined ur email list and I admire u for this last email. Please keep them coming makes us feel normal. We don’t need advice its a since of reality check for us. Work on u and ur husband and forget about the teens. They will come back around in their later years trust me! God bless u and ur family!
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That just broke my heart. I realize that this doesn’t offer total peace for you at the moment BUT …..what are WE doing wrong. Remember, it takes a village to raise a child just too bad the village does not accept that role anymore. They are suffering in silence like you. Because we no longer have that “universal front” in either... [Read more >>]
I just read your article about bullying and while I agree on most
points, I have to disagree with you about some others. I didn't see
the news story you saw,but I can tell you that it isn't always
possible to move a child to another school. Our daughter was harassed
in one school she went to for being gay. We were living in a small
town on the... [Read more >>]
Cleaning & Organization
Make the bed as soon as you wake up.
Wash up—do your make-up, throw on some jeans and a tee.
Wipe down the bathroom counter when you leave the bathroom in the morning. Wipe mirrors, my kids always spit toothpaste onto them, I keep Windex wipes under the sink.
Do a load of laundry, every morning, fold it, and put it away as soon as it’s... [Read more >>]
Health & Nutrition
Time for shaping up!
Okay girls no more excuses. Get off your ass!
Spring will be here before you know it, and what better Resolution?
We are all going to become healthier, leaner, stronger,
If you can lose that extra weight you are going to feel great
Let’s do it together
You will feel less stressed
You will look great
You will be stronger physically
Take... [Read more >>]
Budgeting & Work at Home
Take control of your finances
Ladies, it’s time for us to step up to the plate and gain control of our finances! We are smart, savvy women. So why is it so hard to get control of our money? Well, it’s easy. We don’t really want to, or we feel so completely overwhelmed by the monster pile of growing bills, we just decide not to care so much.
Well, I’m tired of not caring,... [Read more >>]
Beauty & Fashion
Give up shopping
What do you think? Can you give up shopping for a year? No? Me either. How about 6 months or even one month? To me it seems impossible. Sad, I know, but there is something about the thrill of finding a new top that is flattering and fun that just keeps me hunting down the latest and greatest. Honestly, I tire quickly of my wardrobe and adding a new... [Read more >>]