The stress of motherhood never ends...

[Darla Shine]

The stress and worry never end, it only gets worse. I can remember being pregnant and being terrified every single day that I might miscarry or do something wrong to ruin my baby. Then when my babies were here in my arms I cried and worried that I might do something that would kill them. I couldn't sleep because I was worried they would stop breathing. I cried the first time I bathed Connor because I was so afraid of drowning him. When they were sick, you all know, that is just the worst. Their first fevers you imagine the worst. Their first trips to the ER you feel so helpless, so useless. It is all such a freaking nightmare! I thought I had gotten through the hardest part. Hey, we made it through the toddler years with no choking incidents! Yes, we made it to 12 and 9 with no one sticking their tongue into the outlet! Well, no, the worry continues and it is getting worse! As they are getting older I cannot be there every second to guard them. They go off on their bikes. They go to their friend's homes. They play contact sports. And they are developing their independence and it is a fine line between overbearing and not caring. The children do yearn for our involvement yet they want us to give them freedom. My stomach is in knots. I can't sleep through the night. My jaw hurts from the stress. I feel like they are, and I am, under more pressure than ever before. And I say the tween stage is much harder than the terrible twos and threes. Watching my son stress over getting an A on a test or making a sports team is distressing. Hearing my daughter struggle to read a book or make a friend is heart wrenching. I am going to have a hard time getting through the teenage years.

[TracysTribe3]

I don't post here anymore (going to school and back to work) but I still like to read the posts. What has helped me in dealing with the stresses of children going out into the world is to realize their life is a journey, like ours is. They have lessons to learn and challenges to overcome to make them into the person they are supposed to be. I suppose it helps to have this understanding on a spiritual level for it to make sense. I can relax some knowing that I have provided them with a very firm foundation to work with. So when they do have disappointments, difficulties, pain, injustices, etc. in life they aren't going to crumble - they will survive somehow. I can't protect them from the lessons in life we all have to learn by living through them.

This is not to say that I don't still worry that they will get hit by a car riding their bikes to school, that they'll be permanently scarred by a mean kid at school, etc. In that way you are right - we will never quit worrying 100% but it doesn't have to consume us.

[melanie1962]

Well, Darla, i'm sorry to tell you, but the stress/worry never ends. Not even when they are young adults, as mine are. There is always something. Always. What do i do when i realize there is too much worry going on in my head? PRAY! That's where i put them in God's hands, knowing he loves them even more than i do. Does that completely stop the worry? For a day or a night, it does. But then the worry is back again. What's funny is my mom was never really like that, but Dad was....and still is..... HE admitted he is still a worrywart about me and my siblings, and now of course, our spouses and our kids. HA But seriously, we need to chill a little or we will get in bad health from all that stress. But i'm not helping matters am i? hahahaha

[cejgeorgia]

I am feeling the same way. My daughter is going to be eight and she just wants friends to come over and play. But were getting to the age where girls get into their own groups and she has a disability so it's hard. I thought the baby stage was tough-HA!

[MumofMany]

Maybe I'm odd but I don't worry about it all. I do my best for my children and my family and friends and I accept that doing my best is all I can do. If something goes wrong then I know that there was probably nothing I could have done to prevent it beforehand.

You live and learn and I'm a big believer in fate... You can't hide from life so what's the point of living it terrified of what might happen?