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Green with Envy?

For many of us, the "other side of the street" often looks greener. We think, "Oh, if only I had this or that, then I would feel/look/be better." We get caught up in comparing our lives -- what we have and what we don’t have -- with others. At the same time, our culture encourages us to consume, to acquire, to have more and to have it now! Insidiously, we are led to believe that this is the answer for that which ails us. So we buy into the illusion, attempting to define who and what we are by what we have, wear, drive, or where we live. The question is, "Just how well is this working?" If the answer is, "not very well," then let’s make a decision - RIGHT NOW - to do things differently.

For openers, let’s stop comparing our insides to somebody else’s outsides. In other words, stop comparing how we are feeling about ourselves to how somebody else’s life looks. Deep down we all know that things are seldom how they look.

At the same time, maybe we need to let go of "perfection" as our standard of living. Perfection is nothing more than an illusion. We think we achieve it, only to lose it in the next breath. We are not perfect; we are not meant to be perfect. We are human and sometimes we just need to forgive ourselves for our humanness.

The good news is, we don’t have to continue to live in the angst of trying to "live up to the Joneses." We can begin to change things by taking a couple of moments each morning to get on track with what’s real and important. The way to do this is by keeping a stack of 3 by 5 cards handy and beginning each day by making a short list of three things.

1) List your priorities. Simply put, what really matters to you? When it’s all said and done, what is most important in your life? It is when we lose sight of our true priorities that we begin looking elsewhere for fulfillment.

2) Write down one good thing you can do for yourself. This is all about daily self-care, and it is much more than getting the occasional manicure or massage. It includes getting enough rest, eating right and nutritiously, staying spiritually connected, doing some form of exercise, and maybe even paying attention to the saying, "Just for today, I will not ‘should’ all over myself."

3) Write down something for which you are grateful. If you really give this some thought, chances are that you will have much to choose from!

Starting the day off with this little list will help us keep our priorities alive, honor our need for self-care, and maintain gratitude for everything we have. The longer we continue to do this, the greater our chances of living with less impulse and more authentic intention. And being "green with envy" will become a thing of the past.

Betty Hill Crowson is an Holistic Life Coach, Spiritual Retreat Leader, and author of The Joy is in the Journey: A Woman’s Guide through Crisis and Change. For information on Betty’s Teleclasses and upcoming retreats, please visit www.thejoyisinthejourney.com.